The Uninvited Guest

By Joey Jules

Stephen stood at the entrance with his hand on the door nob. He was growing tired of the conversation. I told you, you have the wrong place.” he said for the second time to the man standing on his front porch.

I know what I saw, and this is the right place! The man exclaimed. “You have my wife and she is in there, so let me in or I will go through you if I have to!”

Stephen frowned. “Listen sir, I don’t know you or your wife. She is not here. You need to leave right now!”

The man’s eyes narrowed. “I will see her again, and believe me, you and me are not through with each other!” The man turned around, stepped off the porch in a huff and stormed away.

Stephen sighed. He watched the man walk down his gravel driveway until he was out of sight,  and shut the front door,  engaging the lock with a click. The last light of the day was shone through the cabin window. He went and sat on the sofa and lit himself a cigarette, inhaling deeply and savoring the sensation of nicotine running through his veins. Continue reading

A Million Hits

By Christian Laforet

“Bro, my dick is killing me.” Kev adjusted the offending organ as he walked across the living room.

His roommate, Bryan, looked up over the rim of his Redbull. “Sucks dude. What’d you do to it?”

“No fucking idea man. I just woke up and it hurts so bad.”

Bryan chuckled. “Did you bang any bitches last night bro?”

Kev scratched his head. “I don’t know. I was drunk as shit. I think so though. I can remember a dirty, dirty girl, a tight hole and some serious moaning.”

“Niiiice,” Bryan said with a grin. His demeanor changed quickly though as a thought came to him. “Whoa—dude, maybe you got an STD.”

The thought horrified Kev. He had been hooking-up downtown for years and had, so far, never ended up with anything more than crabs. A pain rocketed up his penis. “Fuck man, I don’t know, but it hurts pretty bad.”

“You might want to go see a doctor or something. My brother got something called Trich. His piss was all green and foamy for like a month.”

“Shit no! I don’t want word getting out that I might have an STD. I’m gonna go take a look at it, then Google it. I don’t want to ruin my rep over some dumb shit like this.”

Kev ducked into the bathroom and instantly dropped his shorts. His dick was bruised and scraped, there was also a small lump along the right of the shaft. “Oh fuck me…”

Peeing was an exercise in torture. It took a great deal of coaxing to get anything to come out at all, and when a stream finally did emerge, it was bloody. “Jesus, no! What the fuck?”

Kev rushed back to his room and frantically searched the internet for answers. Several different options appeared before him; none of them good. He realized he would need to find the girl he had banged if he wanted any specific details about his condition.

“You okay? You look all pale and shit,” Bryan asked, the crumbs from the cold Pop Tart he was eating dotting his shirt.

“Fuck no, I’m not okay. My dick looks like it got attacked by a fuckin’ shark. I’m going over to the Machine to see if I can find out who I banged last night.”

Pop tart clutched in hand, Bryan waved. “Good luck bro. I hope your dick doesn’t fall off.” Continue reading