Dime Store Detective – Part Four

While walking back to the train station, Thomas called Rachel. The day was wearing into the afternoon and he figured she would be at work by then.

She answered on the third ring. “Thomas Holliday Private Investigations; how may I direct your call?”

“It’s me.” Thomas smiled hearing her nasally voice.

“Oh, well you better not have messed this case up already. You haven’t had one in months.”

“I need a warrant to access the student records.” He stopped walking, bursting with excitement. “She was actually going to throw me out!”

“I’ve already applied for the warrant, it should be in the records by now. I’ll upload it to your file and send one to the school.”

“You’re the best.”

“Don’t forget it come bonus time.” She hung up on him. Continue reading

The Dale of Five Worlds (Part 4)

By Christian Laforet

Robi-Jo squeezed her eyes tight. A scream escaped her lips as her toes plunged through the surface. A chill instantly passed through her body. She wondered briefly why a chill, but her brain insisted that the lava was so hot, that it felt cold. It made sense, she guessed. It wasn’t until she swallowed a mouthful of salty liquid that she started to think that she was not being burnt alive in molten rock. She opened her eyes, and although it stung, she saw that she was submerged in water. Pushing with her legs, she swam upwards.

She found Felicia and Sam already bobbing on the surface. “What the crap?” she yelled to get their attention.

Sam surveyed the endless ocean which stretched across the horizon before looking back at Robi. “I teleported us to Teardrop, the water earth.”

“Oh gee, you teleported us? I hadn’t noticed.” Robi-Jo waved her arms around. “Maybe—and this is just a thought—in the future you could not wait until we’re about to die a horrible death before doing so!”

Felicia nodded. “Yeah, it’s kinda jerky. The whole, making us think we’re gonna die thing.”

Sam frowned. “I’m sorry, would you have rather me leave you in the hands of that narcissistic psychopath?”

“Well, she has a point there.” Felicia shrugged.

Robi-Jo was already fuming, but the smirk that Sam shot her way, sent her over the edge.

“I’ve had enough of you!” She grabbed a hold of Sam and pushed her under the water.

“Whoa!” Felicia tried to wade away, but was somehow pulled into the mix. Continue reading

Dime Store Detective – Part Three

Ben Van Dongen

A cool breeze blew through the open ends of the train station. Thomas turned to it, relishing the feeling on his face as it eased the fatigue from the late night. He kept an eye out for the man he had seen the night before, but the only people there were three young men dressed in casual clothes. They sat at a table eating food from the vending machines and watched a music video, projected over the center of the table by one of their phones. The music, something Thomas didn’t recognize, boomed and twittered across the platform. One of them pointed at him and encouraged the other two to laugh.

The feeder car arrived and Thomas got in, ignoring the taunts he was used to hearing. He sat in a seat across from the doors and adjusted the collar on his tan trench coat. The empty car whooshed into the open and caught up to the train, connecting long enough for him to enter and find another seat. He huffed as he sat, and stretched his neck, cracking it. A woman with a baby carriage made a sour face at the sound and went back to cooing her child. Continue reading

Dime Store Detective – Part Two

The office was quiet. Faint moonlight shone through the window marking a square on the floor that angled onto a corner of the desk. The building was too high for the glow of streetlights. Thomas considered adding a faux light source, but was rarely in the office late enough to bother.

The text on the digital file looked blurred and Thomas rubbed his eyes. He squinted in the dark office and looked for the old Union Station clock he’d bought at auction. It was past three. The excitement at having a case, that caused him to jump around the office and bounce in his seat when he started to work, had faded. Continue reading

Dime Store Detective

Ben Van Dongen

Thomas rested his eyes. He pulled the authentic fedora down and put his feet up on his real wood desk. He hadn’t had a case in months, not that he expected any, but he was getting desperate. He didn’t need the money, the buyout he got when his tech start up was aquired gave him more than he could spend if he tried. His detective business was a dream that the extreme money and young retirement allowed him to fulfill. Thomas’ skills were with genetic programming, but his passion was detective novels.

The collection of folded and faded paperbacks was considered and eccentricity that kept other literary zealots away, but the genera fascinated Thomas. Using his time and wealth to recreate the office of his favourite detective and actually opening for business made him a kook, but he had the money to not care. Thomas even sprung for a human secretary. Big shots, like the CEO of Fresh Choppers, the top conglomerate in the world, didn’t hire humans, and Thomas’ did accents. He had insisted on having a woman, just like the books, but the old Bronx dialect was a bonus. He smiled thinking about it. Continue reading

Dime Store Detective – Complete

Ben Van Dongen

Thomas rested his eyes. He pulled the authentic fedora down and put his feet up on his real wood desk. He hadn’t had a case in months, not that he expected any, but he was getting desperate. He didn’t need the money, the buyout he got when his tech start up was acquired gave him more than he could spend if he tried. His detective business was a dream that the extreme money and young retirement allowed him to fulfill. Thomas’ skills were with genetic programming, but his passion was detective novels.

The collection of folded and faded paperbacks was considered and eccentricity that kept other literary zealots away, but the genera fascinated Thomas. Using his time and wealth to recreate the office of his favourite detective and actually opening for business made him a kook, but he had the money to not care. Thomas even sprung for a human secretary. Big shots, like the CEO of Fresh Choppers, the top conglomerate in the world, didn’t hire humans, and Thomas’ did accents. He had insisted on having a woman, just like the books, but the old Bronx dialect was a bonus. He smiled thinking about it.

The afternoon quietly napped with Thomas. He considered heading down to the local watering hole to get the word on the street. The friendly neighbourhood bartender, paid by Thomas to play the part, kept his ear to the ground. The robotic ones never talked. He contentedly listened to the whir of the fan and the sound of his secretary randomly hitting keys on the typing machine. He swore it was called a typewriter, but she insisted it was a typerator.

Thomas decided to skip the trip to the bar and ride out the rest of the afternoon in the office. At five his secretary would come in and complain about how slow it was and about not getting paid. Thomas would assure her he would come up with the cash, though her fee was promptly transferred to her account weekly. The guys would be at his place for poker by the time he got there, then he would end the night by chronicling his adventure in his own detective novel.

With a stretch, Thomas sighed. It was in the slow afternoons that building and selling his company paid off.

“Mr. Holliday? Rachel, his secretary, called over the antique intercom. Her voice sounded tinny and hollow over the speaker, but the high-pitched nasal quality was all hers. Continue reading

A Million Hits

By Christian Laforet

“Bro, my dick is killing me.” Kev adjusted the offending organ as he walked across the living room.

His roommate, Bryan, looked up over the rim of his Redbull. “Sucks dude. What’d you do to it?”

“No fucking idea man. I just woke up and it hurts so bad.”

Bryan chuckled. “Did you bang any bitches last night bro?”

Kev scratched his head. “I don’t know. I was drunk as shit. I think so though. I can remember a dirty, dirty girl, a tight hole and some serious moaning.”

“Niiiice,” Bryan said with a grin. His demeanor changed quickly though as a thought came to him. “Whoa—dude, maybe you got an STD.”

The thought horrified Kev. He had been hooking-up downtown for years and had, so far, never ended up with anything more than crabs. A pain rocketed up his penis. “Fuck man, I don’t know, but it hurts pretty bad.”

“You might want to go see a doctor or something. My brother got something called Trich. His piss was all green and foamy for like a month.”

“Shit no! I don’t want word getting out that I might have an STD. I’m gonna go take a look at it, then Google it. I don’t want to ruin my rep over some dumb shit like this.”

Kev ducked into the bathroom and instantly dropped his shorts. His dick was bruised and scraped, there was also a small lump along the right of the shaft. “Oh fuck me…”

Peeing was an exercise in torture. It took a great deal of coaxing to get anything to come out at all, and when a stream finally did emerge, it was bloody. “Jesus, no! What the fuck?”

Kev rushed back to his room and frantically searched the internet for answers. Several different options appeared before him; none of them good. He realized he would need to find the girl he had banged if he wanted any specific details about his condition.

“You okay? You look all pale and shit,” Bryan asked, the crumbs from the cold Pop Tart he was eating dotting his shirt.

“Fuck no, I’m not okay. My dick looks like it got attacked by a fuckin’ shark. I’m going over to the Machine to see if I can find out who I banged last night.”

Pop tart clutched in hand, Bryan waved. “Good luck bro. I hope your dick doesn’t fall off.” Continue reading

Probationary Constable Malcolm Wendall’s First Day on the Job

By Edele Winnie

Are you paranoid? I’m paranoid. I was freaking born that way- so it’s not my fault. “For example I noticed the pickup truck right away. It was one of those ones with a cab on the back. Brown, with crappy fake wood panelling. No one on my street has a pickup truck like that. There was some dude sitting in it too. Great, I thought, a new stalker after my sweet little ass.   I peeked between the blinds several times. Men have this problem with me- mostly they want to have pets I think, and I’m not a tameable. To the eyes I’m a cute skinny brunette. Also, I’m kind of like a hyena. I‘ll chew your leg off and laugh about it- nothing personal, it’s just the way I am. Don’t cross hyenas, man. Continue reading